You know you have a toddler when:
1. Your work is interrupted by intermittent screaming.
2. You hide in your bathroom in order to get some peace and quiet.
3. Your house looks like a war-zone.
4. Stanley Steemer is your friend.
5. The thought of the toddler's personal bathroom is not a good thought.
6. You cripple your feet stepping on toys that are strewn throughout the house despite threatening the child's life if he even thinks of taking toys out of his room.
7. Your refrigerator light goes out thanks to the child's constant opening of the door.....and then leaving it open for who knows how long.
8. You feel guilty for leaving your home even to go to the grocery store because he was crying as you left the house.
9. Fenceless swimming pools give you the creeps.
10. Five minutes after you mop the kitchen floor, you find oatmeal strewn all over it.