Wild Goose Chases

I have never been able to think quickly. Not even when I was a fresh-faced kindergartner soaking everything up with my brain. It usually takes me a while to think about things especially when I have to think about finding something. I was the kind of child that had to be taught how to look for something I lost. I remember my dad sitting me down and telling me to go look back in my mind and think about the places where I had been. So, whenever I need to remember where I put something, I literally sit down and think about where I've been. My husband, on the other hand, is a very quick thinker. He probably thought it was odd the first time he was introduced to my way of finding things. We are both absent-minded and misplace things all the time. When we were first married, he would come to me asking where something is. I would stop what I was doing, sit down, and seem to go into a trance. He would stand there looking at me with a dumbfounded look on his face and say, "Uh, hello?" He probably thought I was ignoring his question and would be very impatient until I finally looked at him with an answer. As years went by, not being able to think about anything with him standing there impatiently, I would guess an object's location and thereby send him on wild goose chases. The wild goose chases became more frenzied over the years and I realized that strategy was not working either. Eventually, I got older and became more adept at communicating with my husband. Now, when he asks me where something is, I patiently (or impatiently in some cases) look at him and say, "I need to think about this for a minute." He then understands that he needs to give me some space for a minute or two to go into my trance. As I pull out the missing computer paper, the missing glasses, the white socks, the keys, the checkbook, etc., I whisper thanks to my dad who taught me this strategy of finding lost things. Unless Happy hides it. Then we're doomed.