I have the laziest boy on the face of the earth. If you think yours is the laziest, I beg to differ. I love the kid. He makes me laugh and has a great imagination. I could just eat him up. The one thing that makes me worried about him is that he will turn out to be a bum. On the streets. Homeless. Whenever I ask Caleb to do something for me, out comes this high-pitched whine almost like a fire engine screaming down the street. It especially drives me crazy during school time. I ask him, "Would you act like this if Mrs. Cook told you to do this?" It does make him think about that and his answer would be no. I told him I deserve the same respect as his teacher and I can also whop him if he acts up. It doesn't seem to be working on his behavior, though. Another thing that he hates doing is taking a bath. We have threatened him with all sorts of disgusting things that could happen to him if he doesn't clean himself. I told him if he doesn't wash his hair I will call him lice boy and shave his head bald. That seems to have worked, but we will see. The other day, I noticed his teeth seemed peculiarly yellow for such a young boy. My eyes became slits and I used my "don't mess with me" voice to tell him I know he is not brushing his teeth and he better get to it or he will have a ton of cavities. I then proceeded to try to scare the daylights out of him by telling him will have to get a shot and fillings put in if he does have a cavity or more. He didn't look like he quite believed me. He probably has that invincible feeling that nothing bad could really happen to him or he could prevent it somehow. Because of his extreme laziness, my biggest rule with Caleb is that if he does it right the first time, he won't have to do it again. It will be interesting to see how this kid turns out, God love him.
Doc and I have actually been tweeking with the idea of going on a date. I know. Totally weird. Not the idea of doing something romantic. It's the idea that we actually might have the guts to dump our offspring on some unsuspecting person. This has always been a hard decision for us to make. I mean, we do watch the news and let's face it, we're paranoid. That's probably why we haven't been on a real date that didn't include scarfing down our food as fast as we can and running back home to see if it's still standing and no one is bleeding. Just the other day, I asked Doc, "So, are we going out for Chinese tonight?" I was crossing my fingers mentally, chewing on my lip. I so wanted to be irresponsible. We haven't been on a date in forever and I was craving Chinese like crazy. I suggested that our 13-year-old son get a chance to hold down the fort for a couple hours. I even turned on my sexy voice and said, "We'll have our cell phone with ...
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