Our dog, Leigh, is a German Shepherd. With her family, she is timid, obedient, patient with the boys, and very loving. With strangers, she is altogether different. I find it fascinating watching people's reactions when they come to the door. When I hear her barking, I usually say, "Shut up, Leigh" in a disgusted voice. When strangers hear her barking, they freak out. Delivery men are usually back to their trucks before I even open the door. One day, my husband was doing exhausting, landscaping work with Leigh for company. All of a sudden, Leigh goes off like a shot, barking madly at a door-to-door salesman. My man immediately calls her off, but she still barks her head off at the poor man who had stopped dead in his tracks. My husband yells in an obviously uninterested voice, "Can I help you?" The man can't be heard over Leigh's barking, but my husband got the point when he waved a pamphlet in the air. He yelled, "No, thanks" and the man was prudent enough to turn around and walk the other way as fast as he could. I am usually embarrassed by our dog's unfriendly behavior, but this was funny to me. About two weeks ago, it was time to take the dogs outside to do their business. I opened my back door to find some strange man walking in our backyard. Leigh took off like a shot....again...and ran straight for him barking madly....again. I thought the man was going to pee his pants. He started yelling, "Down! Get down!" I was so shocked by what was happening I didn't immediately react. I noticed he had been headed for the meter, so I yelled for Leigh to come and she obeyed. I closed the door and said, "I'm sorry, but I had no idea you were on my property." He said it was alright in a breathless voice and went to check our meter. I felt embarrassed again, but then I thought, "What if that had been a predator?" Suddenly, I didn't feel embarrassed anymore. Alright, Leigh. Sic 'em. You go get those bad guys.
They instructed me to make sure I have a full bladder on arriving for my ultrasound. Ha. I almost laughed in their faces. Pregnant me plus a full bladder equals a disaster. On my son's birthday back in March, I had to drive all the kids home afterward. I had drunk a lot of water and couldn't believe I had forgotten what happens to me when I drink too much water with no bathroom nearby when I'm pregnant. I counted the minutes till I got home all the while breaking the law and speeding trying to keep in mind not to drive too recklessly screaming at the poky people in front of me. It brought to mind the very first time I experienced a full bladder as a pregnant woman. It was my first baby and my husband was in the Air Force. So, when we had an ultrasound we went to the Academy in Colorado Springs. They told me to drink an astronomical amount of water before I came. I did so and then we started out for the half hour drive to the hospital. By the time we were on the ...
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(BTW I know you were kidding!)