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A Typical Phone Call

This is a typical phone conversation that I had with my mom recently:

Ring! Ring! "Hi, Mom! How are you and Dad doing?"

"We're doing fine, honey."

Screaming heard in the background.

"So, what are you guys going to do this weekend?"

Screaming continues in the background and gets louder.

"Well, we need to go to the grocery store...."

Screaming fills the whole house until the volume is unbearable.

"Mom, can you hold on a minute?" "Sure, honey."

I take the phone with me to see what in the world is going on. I look over the banister and there is Sleepy and Happy fighting over something as usual.

"What is going on?" I demand in my "don't mess with mommy" voice. Happy tearfully explains that Sleepy won't let him see out the window. There is Sleepy pushing Happy with all his might and Happy screaming his head off trying to see out the window.

Since I was on the phone at the time, I told Sleepy to go to his room and I would deal with it later.

Getting back on the phone, I realized Mom had heard the whole thing.

A couple weeks later, my brother calls. Holding Sneezy, I pick up the phone.

"Yo what up?" "Hi, Gug, how are you? Oh, hold on a sec."

"Bashful! Come get this dog and put her outside, please!"

"How are you doing?" I asked, but was interrupted.

"What is it, Happy?" Happy complains in an ear-splitting voice about something and getting that taken care of, I am finally able to talk to my brother again, but then the phone drops. Trying to keep the phone to your ear while picking up the other end and holding a wiggling three-month-old takes dexterity.

"Oh! Sorry about that, Gug. So, what's up?"

I am barely able to finish the conversation with him and then we hang up.

That's what most of my phone calls are like these days.

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