Rugrats and Dirty Rugs

Our house sits on critter heaven. We've battled snakes, spiders, and a lizard comes to visit in our window well daily. Did I mention we also have visiting centipedes? Doc finds the occasional centipede in the basement and does the usual spraying till they suffocate. Then he likes to bring me his prize and talk about how big and nasty it was. One time, I took Happy into the downstairs bathroom to give him his bath. There was a bowl sitting in the tub and I picked it up just as Happy was sitting down. Cowering underneath the bowl, was a humongous centipede and it was going straight toward my little boy's hind end. Since I was not expecting this little surprise, I was caught off-guard. Since I am also a girl, I did the usual screaming of the lungs as well. "Ahh, ahh, ahh!" came out a few times before I was able to grab a hold of my senses and my son. Since there had been a few seconds of hysteria, Happy was able to get a good look at the thing. "Worm in ...

It was interesting to see my husband and our two-year-old interact without me as a mediator. They both have a strong will and sometimes it tends to clash. Since I was relegated to the bedroom with our newborn baby, my husband had the duties of cooking, cleaning, and babysitting for a week. Many times that week, I heard the usual screaming and crying from Aidan and my husband dealt with it swiftly and efficiently. At one point, though, Aidan stomps up the stairs crying and goes into his room. Our bathroom is situated right next to his room and since I was in there, I was able to hear his ranting. I heard, "I tell Mama! I tell Mama!" in a pathetic, feel-sorry-for-me voice. It's hard not to laugh and feel sorry for the little termagent.

When I was twelve years old, my mother's cousin brought her new baby for a visit. I was drawn to that little person like a moth to a flame. I was the firstborn of four children and already a little mother. I had my baby dolls and Barbie dolls, tea sets and doll house, but this was a REAL baby that I was allowed to feed and change. I remember lovingly doing these things during their visit and then as time went by they had to leave. I keenly felt my empty arms and went looking for my mother. We usually had our "woman to woman" chats in the bathroom and that's where I found her putting things away. With my heart in my eyes, I begged her to have another baby so I could take care of him or her. She sat down on the toilet seat and gently broke the news that she was done having babies. With tears rolling down my cheeks and my heart breaking, I heard her tell me that soon I will be able to have my own baby to love and hold. I love the newborn stage. It's my fav...

As I bite into a luscious Reese's peanut butter cup, I have one thought in my mind. Thank you, Lord, that none of my children have food allergies. Otherwise, I would not be able to steal some of the candy bars from their Halloween candy stash. I would normally consider myself a meat and potatoes kind of gal. I would rather eat roast and mashed potatoes than candy any day. There comes a time, though, in every woman's life when eating chocolate becomes a must. Yesterday, I grabbed the pumpkin full of candy, locked the bathroom door, filled the tub with hot water, and luxuriated in a chocolate fest. It had to be done. May I say that Snickers is the best candy bar ever? Of course, Reese's comes in a very close second. Peanut butter and chocolate were made for each other. I was a bit disappointed to see no Butterfinger bars at all. What's up with that? Aidan probably noticed the less than full pumpkin because he brought me an empty one and told me that we need ...

Tuesday afternoon, I had my first false labor ever. I've never had false labor. It sucks. When I thought the baby was coming, all of a sudden adrenaline shot through my body and I began to shake from head to toe. I was excited and ready to go. My husband jumped up and starting doing what husbands do when they know their wife is about to give birth. He was going to make sure I made it to the hospital no matter what. We got the kids ready to go and told them to go outside and play. For some reason, the contractions were not progressing. I thought it was odd and decided to pace for a while hoping that would help things along. The boys came in to eat hot dogs and went out again. Still nothing was really happening. So, I decided to eat something since I hadn't eaten since breakfast. After that, the contractions were gone for good. That left us all utterly depressed. I was hoping to finally hold this little baby, my husband was hoping to meet him, too, of course, but ...

Last week, I thought my brain was going to explode into a million pieces. At the worst possible time in my life, I got a jury duty summons. Now, most of you might not think that was something to panic over. Some of you might even say, "Yippee! I get paid for this!" Me? I hate even the thought of jury duty. In the good ole state of Colorado, there is no job exemption from this duty. That means homeschool moms, too. How asinine. Why do they think we are homeschool moms in the first place? Don't they realize we are the only caregivers of our children and that our husbands would have to take the day off to take care of them while we sit on our butts in a courthouse? No, I do not like jury duty. I had asked my son to be my legs for me and go get the mail from the mailbox at the end of the drive. He came back in with it all and I slowly went through it. When I came to the jury duty summons, I thought I was seeing things. I did a double take. I immediately rippe...

When you know you have a big family: 1) You come downstairs with two of your children and make them breakfast. The two-year-old is talking at the top of his lungs. You say, "Shhh! Be quiet! EVERYONE is sleeping." 2) You go through four gallons of milk a week.....and you know it's only going to get worse. 3) Your grocery bill is sky high....and you know it's only going to get worse. 4) You have to plung your toilets twice a week. 5) Your laundry room looks like Mt. Everest. 6) You need an entire room just for the stuffed animals. 7) You count heads in public places to make sure you are not losing someone. 8) You start barricading certain rooms in the house to keep them clean. 9) Mr. Clean Magic Erasers and Murphy's Oil Soap have become your best friends. 10) You realize that this will not last forever and hope to cherish every moment of it.

Our poor sons are doomed to be absentminded for the rest of their lives. It's in the genes. Both of their parents are prone to this and it will only get worse as we get older. If I don't put the van keys in a certain place, I will have to go ransacking the house for them. My husband is the same way with his eyeglasses. All of our sons will have this problem, but with Caleb it seems he has inherited a double shot. In my post Sliding Doors , Caleb leaves the van door open for the whole world to see. This occurrence hasn't happened in some time, but on Halloween night, it made its appearance again. I feel it was bound to happen again when he was thinking about something else. We had decided to meet Daddy for dinner and went to a fast food restaurant. We got our food, sat down, and started enjoying the high-fat, high-cholesterol yumminess. At one point, I looked out the window and immediately gasped. There was our van with the door wide open yet again. "Caleb! I told you t...